More Than An Alcoholic

Its weird what being an alcoholic does to you.  I feel like once you are honest with yourself and those around you, it attaches itself to you like its part of your name.  When I’ve introduced myself to new people lately I’ve had to stop myself from saying, “Hi, I’m Amelia, and I’m an alcoholic.”  It becomes such a part of you that you forget all the other things about yourself.  The things you like, the things you hate, the things that make you laugh and cry, or both of those together, and all the other things that make you, you.  As I sit here and write this tonight as an alcoholic on her 56th day of recovery, I am going to list 56 things about me that I am sure many of you don’t know.

1. I love running.  I’ve been doing it since I was 12 and will probably run until I’m too old to do it anymore.
2. I LOVE horror movies.  In fact, I am watching one right now.  I watch them all months out of the year, even in Christmas-y December, or on a happy summer day.
3. I am obsessed with ranch dressing, and I dip almost everything in it.  I am very specific about the kind I like though, and I am convinced mine is the best.
4. I am not a morning person.  When I drink its worse, but just in general, I am not a fan of early mornings.
5. I am a night owl.  I’ve spent many years of my life working the graveyard shift because at night is when I am at my best.  Maybe this can explain the horror movie thing, I dunno ;).
6. I love to bake, and even more I love baking things for holidays and parties that match the theme.  Some of them have turned out amazing, and some…. not so good. #pinterestfail
7. I am not the type of girl that wears perfume, does their nails frequently, or really anything like that.  Most the time you will find me with unpainted or chipped nails from when I painted them 6 months prior.
8. I am an esthetician and love to wax.  I do my own brows, lip, underarms, and other places that I’ll refrain to mention here… 🙂
9. I am very spontaneous in most aspects of my life, but mostly when it comes to my hair.  I once had a great idea to dye my hair from black to pastel pink, and I also thought I could do it all by myself.  It took more bleach than I am proud to admit, but eventually, I liked it!  Picture below…
10. I love make-up and following make-up tutorials on YouTube.
11. I love old people. Love them. And, I love taking care of them even more. The older, the better.
12. I love making lists.  I am not the type who uses my phone for reminders and appointments.  I love just getting a piece of paper and writing down everything the old school way.
13. This is quite embarrassing for me to admit…. but I love pens.  And on top of that, I am so so SO particular about the type of pen I will use.  I have over 300 pens in a box, and I would be devastated if I lost one.  If I go to the store I can guarantee you at some point you will find me in the office supply aisle.  To be honest I just love office supplies all together.
14. I never ever ever finish a drink, unless its alcohol of course.  Whenever I get fast food, I always order a large diet coke promising myself that I am going to finish it this time, and then there it is the next morning still nearly full with all the ice melted.
15. LeBron James is one of my heroes, I’d like to say I am kinda obsessed.
16. I sleep with at least 4 pillows, and I put them all around me so no matter where I turn, theres a pillow.
17. I have watched “You’ve Got Mail” over 400 times and can recite the first half the movie.
18. I have a talent of singing just like Aaron Neville.  There aren’t many people who have heard me do this, but those who have don’t let me forget it and always ask me to sing something. Don’t ask me how I figured out I could even do this, because I don’t know.
19. I love Dateline NBC, and I’ve seen every single episode.  A fun saturday night to me is getting in my sweats and watching the “Saturday Night Mystery”.  I know, I’m so fun.
20. I love marshmallows.  I can pretty much eat an entire bag in one sitting.
21. I am notorious for getting up at 2am and eating something.  I don’t know why I do this, but I’ve been known to make a quesadilla, mac and cheese, or heat up any leftovers in the fridge at all hours of the night.
22. I wear flip flops year round.  Yep, even when its snowing.
23. I love dogs more than people and would love to open my own rescue one day.
24. I don’t own a coat, and never really have.  This is one thing I don’t understand about myself.
25. Every time I laugh, I cry.  It doesn’t matter if I’m just chucking a little bit, or full-on gut laughing.  I always have tears coming down my face.
26. I am terrified of lightening.
27. I usually say what I am thinking, and at times after I’ve said something I think, “I shouldn’t have said that.”  That happens more often than not.
28. I HAVE to sleep with a fan.  And not just a ceiling fan, a fan that is loud and plugs in the wall. If I don’t have my fan at night I am not a very fun person to be around, and I probably won’t sleep.  This has made traveling difficult at times.  For those of you who are like me, there is an app called “bedtime fan” that is the closest thing to a fan that you can possibly get.
29. I love organizing things.  Closets, kitchen cabinets, etc etc.
30. I love the Kardashians.
31. I also love Dr. Phil and have seen every single episode.
32. I”m a major nail biter, and I bite my cuticles until they are down to nothing.  There was a time pretty recently that I got an infection from doing this and had to get on an antibiotic.  Yes, I actually walked into the instacare with a girl in front of me who had clearly been in a horrible accident with a kitchen utensil, and when it came my turn to check-in I had to say “I picked a hangnail and I think my finger might fall off.” #proudmoment. Anyone have any tips on how to not do this?  Advice welcome.
33. I love popping zits.
34. I love having my hair played with and brushed.
35. I have literally never washed my face at night, or done any skin care for that matter, and I’ve still been fortunate enough to not have any acne.
36. I love the Jazz, and my favorite player is Rudy Gobert.  I also have a jersey of his that he signed.
37. I love playing solitaire.  I play it for hours some nights while I”m watching a movie or just plain bored.
38. I once was 12 hours to the altar when my fiancé called the wedding off.
39. I lived in Scotland when I was 3.
40. I have been known to laugh at really inappropriate times and once got kicked out of the temple for laughing at a time when I clearly shouldn’t have been.  Once I start laughing, its hard for me to stop.
41. I am the youngest, the baby of the family.
42. I lived in Houston, TX when I was 17 years old.  I also live in Billings, MT when I was 27.  I have no fear of moving to new places and being on my own.
43. I LOVE nachos, and I make a pretty mean plate of them.  Try me, I won’t disappoint you.
44. A couple weeks ago I started CPR on a friend and ultimately saved her life.  This was a definite eye opening moment for me and something I never thought I would do.
45. I wear my heart and emotions on my sleeve, which means you can usually tell how I’m feeling just by looking at me.
46. I hate rap music with a passion.
47. Whenever I go to a sit down restaurant I usually order an appetizer for myself.  You’ll rarely see me order an actual meal.
48. I have 8 piercings and love all of them.
49. I have a talent for putting on $3 fake eyelashes from walmart.  Most the time people think I went and got the done somewhere.  Nope, $3 from walmart my friends.
50. I love rainy, overcast days.  I could live in Seattle full time.
51. I’ve lived in Draper, Utah most of my life and have never been to the neighboring city, Bluffdale.  Its 2 miles away and I’ve never been there. #weird
52. I love Lagoon.
53. I love nursing and can not wait to graduate with my RN.
54. I have double-jointed thumbs and can bend them back further than is normal.
55. I love funny memes.
56. And lastly, I am a good friend, daughter, sister, and caregiver.  I give my heart to anyone, even those I know might hurt it one day, because I love risk.  Sometimes it’s bitten me in the ass, and other times it’s paid off, and its all ok.  Thats what life is all about.

So, there you have it.  Amelia in a nutshell. And for those of you who struggle with whatever it is life has thrown you, take the label off, put it aside for a bit, and remember all the things that make you, you. Because we are all much more than the mistakes we have made or the diseases we were born with.